Twenty years ago…
“Mommy please don’t send her away!”
Ashley begs and pleads with her mom as she and Shelly hold
on tight to one another. Tears stream
down their innocent childish cheeks.
Shelly holds her tight as if she were holding on to her own life. Mr. Hanson desperately yanks the rusty
strands of Shelly’s pigtails as he pries them apart. Shelly is only six, Ashley is only four. Shelly cries out.
“I won’t do it anymore, I promise daddy.”
“I’m not your father!
And you most certainly are not my daughter. And you can’t control the demons that are inside
you. No more than I can control the
power of God!”
“No daddy, please!” Ashley begs.
“Jolene, take Ashley into the other room!”
Jolene swoops little Ashley into her arms and carries her
down the hallway. Ashely kicks and
screams, reaching for Shelly. Shelly
tries to go after her but Mr. Hanson swiftly picks her up over his shoulders
and carries her to the brown trim station wagon. Though she fights with every strength she
has within her he shoves her into the backseat of the car.
Ashley
appears in the front room window upstairs and looks down at Shelly with tears
streaming down her face. Jolene is on
the porch, arms folded over her chest.
“Must
you do this to them?” She says to Mr. Hanson.
“Don’t
give me the guilt trip, woman. This is
your mess. You brought this upon them
and yourself. You’re lucky I’m a man of
God who doesn’t believe in divorce.”
Mr.
Hanson turns to go into the house.
“Isn’t
every child a child of God? Like you
always preach?”
Mr.
Hanson crouches his shoulders and without uttering another word he heads back
into the house, slamming the door behind him.
“Mommy, I need to go potty,” Shelly cries from the back
seat.
Her face is pale and white.
The only color she shows are the red ribbons in her rusty-colored
hair. A soft motor sound rumbles from a
little gray striped kitten sitting comfortably in Shelly’s little arms. Shelly’s mom, Jolene, drives frantically down
the highway without even making a rest stop.
They’ve already been on the road for an hour and a half, driving down
the 101 towards Astoria, Oregon.
“Too bad, you’re just gonna have to hold it!”
“But I can’t,” Shelly cries.
“Don’t you start that crying! You know what happens when you do!”
But Shelly can’t stop.
She knows how much trouble she’ll be in if she pees her pants.
“Stop it!” Jolene yells.
Her cry turns into a high pitched squeal, Shelly’s eyes
swell with tears streaming down her cheeks.
Jolene steers the car onto the side of the highway, just
north of Long Beach, Washington. She
gets out of her car and jerks the back passenger seat open. She unbuckles Shelly’s seatbelt and allows
her to scurry off
The shaking only makes Shelly cry even more and before she
knows it, she shifts into a kitten; identical to the one in her lap.
“Fine, you want to be an animal, be an animal.”
Jolene snatches both the kittens up by the collar and tosses
them in a dog kennel in the trunk. The
kittens snuggle up with one another the remainder of the trip.
Duane is sitting on the porch, smoking his cigarette when Jolene
pulls into his driveway. It’s an
unannounced visit. Jolene gets out of
the car and marches around to the trunk.
“Jolene?” He says. “What in the hell are you doing here?”
“I thought you might still be living here,” she says. “I
came to drop something off for you.”
Jolene yanks the back hatch open and grabs the dog kennel
with the twin kittens still huddled inside.
Duane looks at it, confused.
“Um…you shouldn’t have?”
“One of them’s your spawn, Duane! I got pregnant with one of your
demon-children!”
“What are you saying?”
Rolling her eyes at Duane, Jolene sets the kennel down and
pulls out one of the kittens. She sets
them both down on the grass and in an instant, one of them shifts into a five
year old little girl.
“Jesus Christ!” Duane reacts instantly, covering Shelly with
his jacket. “Are you telling me she’s my
daughter?”
“Why didn’t you tell me that you were a freak?”
Duane searches his words.
“I had no idea, Jolene.
I had no idea that you were pregnant with my child.”
“I was, and I got stuck with your mess. You tricked me!”
Duane shook his head.
“You know that isn’t true.
We were both drunk when it happened.”
“That doesn’t matter,” Jolene retorts. “You should’ve told
me that you were a freak. I might have
saved myself the trouble of all this drama.”
Jolene proceeds to walk back to her car, Duane chases after
her.
“Wait, where are you going?”
“She’s yours now,” Jolene marches on. “You deal with her.”
“Mommy, wait!” Shelly stammers to her feet, reaching for her
mom.
“You can’t just leave her here!” Duane shouts.
“She’s your responsibility now, Duane! What in the hell am I supposed to do with a
freak? She’ll never fit in with our
family. She’s where she belongs , if not
in hell!”
Duane is aghast by Jolene, shaking his head.
“You’ve got to be kidding me, Jolene! I can’t take care of a child!”
“Mommy, don’t go!” Shelly cries.
Over and over, Shelly cries out for her mom, pleading with
her not to leave her. Without a kiss,
without a hug and even without a wave, Jolene pulls out of the drive way and
disappears around the corner. Shelly
chases after the station wagon, hollering and wailing. It was a cry that could break a heart into
pieces. Duane just stands in the yard,
feeling useless and overwhelmed.
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